over a hundred kinds, man, a hundred kinds

So today we went to the hospital not for any poking or prodding or stabbing of my body, but for a lesson in colostomy bags and their use. Mainly it was directed to my wife, an hour of solid speedy Japanese, which I could somewhat follow and tried to follow the whole hour. Information overload, I think I blew something in my brain. What I did get were a couple things. My stoma, or as I often say, my outtie asshole, is very flat which makes it hard for traditional colostomy bags to catch all the shit without it leaking under the seal. What you need is something that goes up. Mine now kind of looks like a camera lens. The bag I have now is high end type with flexible opening that will make it easier to dump out too. The nurse told us the most popular one is from Sweden, one that is water proof: she showed. Ran some water over it from the faucet and showed us the results, got to see that ball of water suspended on the surface. And when it was gone, completely dry. Unfortunately this genre of bag has not yet been made for the flat type like mine but there’s always the kuchi-biru for that. Lips, they look like lips, portable plastic help, stick to the bottom and mound up. I think that’s all I got. Oh, yeah, except that there’s more than a hundred varieties of colostomy bags. The nurse said, even she has to have a book on hand to look em all up. And the rest was like a data stream pouring into my head. But my wife enjoyed it, she said tanoshikatta. About something in the hospital. That alone is amazing.